I AM WHO I AM......AGAIN!

It is not that my life is so exciting that I forget to post, but that is quite literally what happened last week.  I do not have a memory issue per se but it was a beautiful day, and I wanted to take advantage of the warmth before the sun took its dive at the end of the afternoon.  I did get in the water, despite it being a little too cool, and splashed for a couple of seconds, before coming out again, regaining my nerve and swimming ten strokes.  Only ten, as I could not feel my limbs, and breathing was not as even as it should have been.  If I had continued, it probably would have levelled out, but I did not really see the point.  I do not have to prove anything to anyone, despite everyone trying to prove to me!  Challenges are often set before me, but I do not take them up, as I don't care!  Callous as it may sound, it really is not.  I do not have any need to show prowess in anything.  I am who I am!  It has taken a long time to learn that!

The 'bank holiday' two weeks ago was quite busy.  "Grant isn't in today.  Can I help?"  Going into work was meant to be for 'catch up' purposes, but despite the note on the emails to say we were not open, the conversation takes on the attributes of a vicious circle!  If you are not open, why are you there?  Why are you calling if you know we are not open?  If you are not open, why did you answer the phone?  The latter is a perfectly plausible question.  I have often heard the question, "Why are they emailing me at seven o'clock on a Sunday evening?" with my answer being, "Why are you checking your emails at that time?"  However, I digress.  Grant was not in the office as it was a national holiday.  The horror was quite obvious.  "I can help you".  Yeah!  Right!  The only person who is working is the English woman, who can't know anything!  After all, she is working on a national holiday!

Admittedly, if it was going to be a hot afternoon, that would have been better spent with my book in the sun, I may not have been in the office when the phone calls were most prolific.  "So, what are you, just the answering service?" came the question.  I responded that I was not, and I could probably be of assistance.  After the barrage of insults, and belligerent comments, came the compliments.  "I love your accent.  Where are you from.  I could listen to you all day!"  "Why, thank you, ma'am", I did not say.  She didn't want to hear that.  "That's mighty nice of you, gov'nor", or "Ta missus!" may have been options, but instead, the King's English was used and then, once I had her attention, I answered the question she had called about.  Shock and horror could be heard, as she said nothing!  I was at work, so I may as well work!

Again, I did not object to being in the office.  It was preferable to cleaning out my pantry, which I what I would have probably done if I had not been behind my desk.  Presidents' Day is never a holiday where I tend to do anything exciting.  Perhaps go to the mall, (yawn,) or to some specialty stores, (yawn,) or stay at home because the weather so dictates.  Doing something practical seemed like a good idea.  After all, it is not my holiday, although after twenty years, I should feel as if it is!  It is also the last national 'vacation' for three months, so taking advantage may have been sensible.  

What was more amazing than finding out people were shocked for allowing our staff to have the day off, was a call from a Sheriff.  Those who deal with our department of the law enforcement offices, are not open on a national holiday.  It is 'admin'.  At least that is what I have always been led to believe.  'Admin' take national holidays.  It is part of the 'office' package.  However, this one guy was rather eager.  "He said he aint the guy.  Do y'all have a picture, or a date of birth, or something that I can use to say, heck yeah you are!"  I love the different turns of phrase that come from different parts of the state, and country!  I can't imagine a British Bobby, in uniform, using the language that I am accustomed to.

The rest of the week ran into the weekend, and as set out in the first paragraph, I started to write with the full intention of finishing when coming back from my splash but clearly forgot!  What caused me to forget, believe it or not, I cannot remember!  It was not until Monday afternoon that I thought about it, and that was because I was sitting in the dentist's chair!  "Did you have a good weekend?  Did you do anything exciting?"  Um?  Oh!  I forget to finish my post!  

Although my penchant for the dentist is not favourable, it was all very generic.  Walking out thirty minutes later (or there about) meant it was all put behind me for a while.  There was a time when I considered dentists to be a little sadistic, looking forward to inflicting pain, but nowadays, it seems to be about 'prevention' rather than 'cure'. As my sister says, it must be one of the most hated professions! Why would you want to train for years to be the most hated person!  However, perhaps it is not the case now.  Maybe it is an age thing!

The 'answering service' took quite a few return calls this week, mostly from Sheriff's or Constables, whose services I required in the deliverance of documents.  When they asked for me, and I stated this  was me, they all made a strange sound.  Not all made the same sound, but it equated to either surprise, or confusion.  Once I stated my reason, and appeared to be quite au fait with the system, most warmed up and were very helpful.  

Occasionally, I am taken aback by Texas, and Texans.  Being
'professional' has little to do with speech or attire.  I learned that when an attorney presented some papers to a judge in a courtroom, wearing a pair of very dark jeans and a white unbuttoned shirt.  (The Attorney, not the judge!)   It was smart, yet too casual for a British courtroom. However, a British courtroom would have a barrister, and not a lawyer pleading a case in front of a judge. (For the most part!)  "Yes, judge!" rather than, "Your honour!"  All this to say, I had to call our bank this week, and once I had answered the 'security' questions, the person on the other end simply said, "Thank you, hun".  Perhaps it is acceptable now in my homeland, but it wasn't when I left.  It is interesting to feel as if I have 'scored' on one side of the ocean, but would have felt a little insulted on the other! Everything is territorial. 

My car sped up the hill.  It was as if she had been given a 'transplant'. I could not believe the vigour she appeared to have, and I could almost hear giggles from the engine.  I called the mechanic to say thank you!  He was a little surprised, but grateful I called.  "Two reasons. We don't always get a thank you, and now I know who to get to work on mine!"  That sounded like a good deal!  I have no idea what the cowboys who worked on mine over the years did to her, but it was not a good job!  

March, as they say, comes in like a lion, and goes out like a lamb.  Not here!  March just comes in!  As cold as it was on Thursday, it was a balmy day on Friday, with a slight breeze, and lots of sun.  With an extra day in February, I was given some respite.  For some reason, to me, the new month is so aptly named.  Time does march on.  I do not know why but the year loses its newness and everything seems to speed up!  Perhaps it is a 'programme' that I have written inside, or perhaps it just is!  Suffice it to say, we hit the new month at the end of the week, and time just seemed to sail by!  

Despite time marching on, and the fact that I have been here for two decades, it is still impossible for some people to think I am anything more than a voice!  Those who have dealt with our company for a considerable time, still find it hard to believe anything I say.  Perhaps it is because they think I just don't know, or perhaps they just listen to the accent and don't hear what I have to say!  However, some are quite eager to hear my answers.  I received a call from an attorney in Connecticut, who after talking to me sent an email containing documentation for delivery, and saying that I, yes, me, had been 'highly recommended' and I, yes, me, got 'top marks' from one particular paralegal at the firm that gave said recommendation.  It was quite the moment.  It was a proud moment!  However, it was soon taken away by someone who has no idea of how the industry works, and explained the 'rules' to me like I was a child learning how to read!  I did not tell him that he was completely wrong, and if it came to it, I could testify before the judge, "Yes, judge.  This is ineffectual because.....".  I wonder what the judge would think!  This too, I take not personally.  A comedian here has a catchphrase, "You can't fix stupid!"  I rise not to the challenge when I am given a dressing down by someone who thinks I cannot know, but who in fact, knows little themselves. The joy of being an Alien!  Yes, that is my official title!  ET does only stand for Extra Terrestrial, but Emigrated Tracie!

All in all, this post can be taken negatively or positively.  I choose the latter!  There comes a time when it suddenly hits you that it really doesn't matter, in a lot of cases, what people think you know, don't know, purport to know, or not.  If you know, you know!  I had a good teacher!  I also did my homework!  

Another round of reading, and catching up on fictional espionage (or is it) and a toe dip in the cold water, will finish off the weekend nicely.  Perhaps next week I can deliver a more humourous account of the woman who sits back quietly in the wings, unless someone ruffles her feathers, in what I hope not to forget to be ..... another story!