DON'T DO THAT!

I was up with the proverbial lark on Monday morning.  Although the days of waking up to an alarm for my mother are unnecessary, she still sets it each morning, in case she should sleep in past the breaking of dawn!

With the weekend, and the third birthday party turning into a memory, I had another week ahead of me.  Purposely, I had not made too many arrangements for my first week, as I was not sure what 'results' my mother would receive when she had her blood tests the previous week, and did not want to make plans, only to have them cancelled.  

It was a lovely surprise when I opened the door, and saw not only Beverly, but also Jodi, as they had come to take me out to Watford to go shopping.  Perhaps not the most exciting adventure for some, but for me, an absolute necessity.  After each of us giving the others our news, and catching up on some gossip, we entered the shopping mall, and I took out my list.  "Hey, how are you?", I asked the girl at the check out.  "We don't do that here, Trace!" Jodi reminded me. "Okay", said the girl, completely confused by the question.  "Have a great rest of the day!", I chirped after the transaction, and received another "We don't do that here, Trace!", and another glum look from the cashier.  Each shop I went into, I engaged the cashier in conversation, and each time, Jodi repeated the motto.  It was rather amusing.  

Having purchased half of what was on my list, we headed to the cafe for lunch.  As we walked through to the back of the restaurant, I thought I heard my name being called.  There, in the queue, was my nephew and great-niece.,  It was a lovely surprise, as they were going on holiday the next day, and I didn't think I would see them again until Christmas.  "Can I ask how he is?", I jokingly asked my advisor!  

My cheese and tomato sandwich was, indeed, just what the doctor ordered.  Back in Blighty, less is definitely more!  A basket of chips (fries) and I was in seventh heaven!  After lunch, and more 'catch up', we walked back to get the car.  Surprisingly, I noticed my friend Judy with her daughter and grandchild.  This was turning into "reunion" visit, having seen so many people in passing.

By the time dinner arrived on Monday, which was prepared and served by my mother, I felt as if I could not eat another thing.  I was starting to feel the effects of 'living at home', and whilst being force fed home cooked meals, dessert and chocolate, (a little bit wont hurt you, says my mum) does not sound like purgatory to some, it can be a little daunting.

"Hey, how are you?" was received with a little more enthusiasm at the supermarket.  However, without Jodi being behind me to let me know "We don't do that here, Trace!", there was no stopping me.  "Are you having a good day?", I asked with renewed encouragement, and was answered with a slight shrug and mournful eyes.  "Only four days to Friday!" I announced joyfully, but this proved too much for the cashier, and the look of  "Christmas is months away. Please stop", was enough to halt my filling the area with mirth and good cheer!  "Joy to the world", would have been an overkill, in the middle of August, but I was in a good mood!  "Have a great rest of the day", I said with a big smile, and was ready to duck as I expected something to be thrown in my direction as I left! "What were you talking to the girl about?" asked my mother as we got into the car.  I told her about our one way conversation, and she replied, "We don't do that here, Trace!"  

I was delighted to accept the challenge of 'grandchildren watching' in the afternoon, and we played in the garden until Steph had finished working.  Ollie had decided that clothes were not a good option for the afternoon, and I was a little concerned about the weather being too chilly, but Steph was not perturbed.  

"How are you doing, today?", I asked the woman at the counter.  "Fine.  How can I help you?", came the blunt reply.  I wanted to know if I could exchange Samantha's 'bag for life', but she was unsure, and referred me to a cashier. "Hey, how are you doing today?", I asked the young man behind the till.  "Good thank you, madam.  How can I help you?", he asked, rather confused as I did not have a basket to 'check out'.  He, too, did not know whether the 'bags for life' were replaceable, and referred me to his supervisor.  The supervisor did not look old enough to be let out alone, let alone be of an age to be employed.  If we were in the end of the nineteenth century, he would have been put down a mine, or used (as was Oliver Twist) by villains to squeeze through small windows to enter a house, in order to open the door and let the rest of the 'gang' in. However, a supervisor he was, and no doubt of an age to do the job with conviction! (No pun intended!)  "Hey, how are you doing?", I asked with the same enthusiasm.  "Um fine.  How can I help you?"  I asked if he could replace Samantha's 'bag for life'.  "We don't do that here!", he said, confusing me, as I had never met him before, but then realised he was talking about the bag, rather than my greeting!  Apparently, the 'bags for life', were for the life of the promotion, rather than the life of the one buying the bag!  I chose not to press the issue, as it really was not worth it, and thanked him for his time and told him to "Have a great rest of your day!"  

I went with Steph and the boys to the park in the afternoon, and 'grandma' was quite happy to follow Ollie down the slide.  However, whereas the three year old knew that the muddy puddle at the bottom was to be avoided at all costs, he failed to tell his grandmother!  Sliding off the end into the mire caused great excitement, and amusement.  However, the next slide was not for grandmas, or at least not for those with any hips!  Fortunately, I was not stuck fast!  However I did have to manoeuvre to release my post elementary school legs from the contraption.  This, too, caused a lot of amusement.

We were half way through the week, and I was going out with my friend Lesley.  As usual, we had a great evening, catching up.  It is always such a blessing to see her, as we have known each other for in excess of half a century, and still manage to find so much to reminisce about, hardly ever touching on the same subject twice!  Always too short an evening, we said cheerio, with the promise to catch up whenever we could!

Busy was I on Thursday, with several places to go, and watching a ticking clock.  The ride to my sister-in-law, Rose, was not too bad.  I followed my written instructions, and did not panic when, once again, I failed to recognise my surroundings, once I was 'off the beaten track', and bypassing Stanstead airport!  Arriving a little before eleven, I backed into her drive, just in time to meet her daughter-in-law, who had arrived with flowers.  "It's her anniversary today, isn't it!", was the rhetorical question, as I felt that I had failed.  I pride myself on remembering dates, but this year I have felt they have all rolled into one, and I cannot remember that!

Rose took me out for lunch, and we chatted quite enthusiastically on many subjects.  It is always fun!  Being grandmothers has not changed our outlook on life, but we do find it amusing how different things are!  It was a wonderful day, and over too soon, but I wanted to avoid the traffic which, thankfully, was not as bad as expected. I came home for a while, before heading out to Richard.  

I arrived a little before six, and the kids were in the bath.  Richard arrived at the same time, and Ollie was delighted to see his daddy from around the corner of the tub!  My cousins Lesley and Natalie arrived soon after, and we had a lovely family reunion, and had to fit in lots of 'catch up' in a very short period of time. I was expected at Sheri at 7:15, and Steph had a client at 7:30, that evening.  

Sheri had made dinner, and met me outside her mother's apartment as she had to direct me to a place to park.  Her mother and mine occasionally meet in the queue at the supermarket, but the chance meetings have wained over the years, as both have had health problems.  We all sat down and Sheri explained to her mum that I write about my life.  Attempting to describe the concepts of a blog, I likened it to a diary.  "People all around the world can read it, and this week, you will be in it, mum!", said Sheri to Shirley, whom I am not sure quite understood the concept, but made a good effort to do so.  So, in the spirit of friendship, and enhancing the 21st century education of the elderly, "Hello Shirley!"  Once again, the evening was over too soon, and we vowed to meet again whenever we could!

I was thoroughly exhausted Friday morning!  Off to the supermarket we went, as mum needed 'a few bits'.  For someone who lives, for the most part, alone, and whose appetite, apparently, is not as good as it was, the supermarket make quite a good profit from her visit!  "How are you doing, today?", I asked the cashier. "Not you again!" was the look of despair upon her face.  "We don't ..." was followed with, "I know.  One can but try!"  I did tell the terrified girl to enjoy the rest of her day, and made my way back to the car!  

I drove to Borehamwood for 12.  Walking around the supermarket, I was a woman with a mission. Box of Thornton's chocolates for my husband, and some bags in which to wrap those things that needed plastic bag wrapping!  "Hey, how are you today?", I asked the employee as he was pushing a cart around, marking prices, and the like.  "Yep", was the response.  "Bin bags", I said, without giving any more information. "Aisle 11", was the super quick response.  "Have a good..........", was all I managed before he whisked off to another ailse.  

I met Maggie outside Tesco, and we headed up to the coffee shop.  Neighbour's when we lived in Radlett, we arranged a 'Jubilee' party many, many years ago.  We discussed the kids, grandkids, jobs and life in general.  It was a fabulous visit, and we promised to stay in touch.  "Your Matnee is a case!" she said, as only a Liverpudlian can. With probably only a former trace of her original accent, I could sit and listen to her all day!  

The afternoon was spent relaxing, unknotting some wool.  Some things are the same no matter which continent you are sitting upon! As I was untangling, someone knocked on the door.  "Ello darlin'!" said the kid standing on the doorstep. "We are tree surgeons, and wanna give you a price on yer trees back there.  We can 'ack 'em back for yer".  A tree surgeon? Call me a cynic, but I doubted this was the case.  The word 'hack' was not the only reason I had to question his qualifications!  Younger brother of the supervisor he could have been!  "Had them done a few weeks ago, thank you!", I said, wondering how my mother would have taken to this child calling her 'darlin' should she have opened the door. "But....oh, wrong 'ouse", he said and ran away!

Richard arrived home a short while after I arrived, and put dinner in the oven.  Steph and the boys had gone to a party at the farm, and she had very kindly made a lasagna, which we were going to share, whilst having some mother-son quality time.  After putting the world to rights, and enjoying dinner, which was scrumptious, we sat back to watch a film.  Steph called after a while, and asked for some help bringing in the boys.  Ollie bounded in the door, and proceeded to tell me something about his mum, his friend, and the party, all rolled into one.  I could not decipher the code, but the laughter was enough to know that it was rather amusing, and he had enjoyed the festivities!  He refused to say goodnight, as in his mind, he was not going to bed, but was going to party all night. However, once his head touched the pillow, he was fast asleep!

"There is something on the grass", my mother said to me on Saturday morning.  I went out to inspect this object, and came running back in, quicker than my legs would carry me. It was a rat! It looked as if it had been dropped, as it was not only very deceased, but almost decapitated. "What do you want me to do?", I asked, rather bravely.  I offered to bury it, or put it in a bag and transfer it to the dustbin.  We decided that as the bins were not due to be emptied until Tuesday, and the weather was looking to be quite warm, a burial would be the better option.  I was unsure as to why I had offered to do this, as I am not particularly partial to vermin, dead or alive.  Venturing out to the garage, in my father's rubber shoes, I retrieved a shovel and a fork, from behind a curtain of cobwebs (as they are not used anymore) and strolled down the garden to the end, where I proceeded to dig a hole.  The ground was very hard, and I should have used some water to soften it, but that would have meant walking back past, (albeit several yards,) the dead creature, and I only had enough bravery for one 'fly past'!  The hole dug, I walked across, timidly, to the corpse.  After dancing around for a couple of minutes, hoping from one foot to another, hoping it was a bad dream, I tried to scoop the body onto the shovel.  It was not easy.  Squealing and screaming as I did so, I tried from the tail end up.  This seemed to work, and once it was on the shovel proper, I ran, quickly, screaming and squealing, across the grass to the freshly dug grave.  Once in, I quickly covered the creature with earth, in case it should spring up and run away, dead as it was, and virtually decapitated!  In my mind, anything could happen. I did not wish it a good rest of the day, nor wish it a good journey to wherever rats go, as I ran as fast as I could to replace to tools in the garage, and then back into the house, where I closed and locked the door, as my mother stood and watched.  "You can leave the door open", she said. I was already back in my room, attempting to shake off the trauma!  

After an early lunch, I went back into the Watford shopping centre. Samantha had made a request after my visit at the start of the week, and I was unsure as to whether I would return.  Wandering from one end of the complex to the other, with a large smile upon my face, I ventured into a few stores, and made a few purchases.  "Hey, how are you today?", was met with a variety of responses from, "alright" and "huh", to "Oh thank you. I am okay.  How are you?"  The parting salutation of "Have a good rest of the day", was met with the same responses! 

Driving from the shopping centre to Richards was virtually traffic free, and I arrived earlier than anticipated.  My son was asleep, due to his suffering from a cold, and he had asked if I could watch the baby, while Steph and Ollie went to a party.  As I walked into the house, Ollie asked if he could have a bath!  It appears that my willingness to be made soaking wet, fully clothed, and make up plays with the toys that accompany my grandson in the tub, is of great benefit!  Twenty minutes later, and sporting a very wet t-shirt, which fortunately was too thick to be entered into a contest, I emerged wetter than the child who had been in the water!  Jamie and I had some quality time, and then his older brother arrived back, with his mum in tow, ready to go to another party, and"stay up very late!"

Mum and I enjoyed a quiet evening in front of the television and I was ready for bed at ten!

The weather in Austin on Sunday was quite wet, as Hurricane Harvey came through, albeit downgraded to a tropical storm. Samantha had said that whilst her house was surrounded by water, they had remained dry, and were able to go out.  Dana said he suffered a couple of power cuts, but all was well.  Mum and I went out for lunch, and enjoyed the warm sunshine!

Tonight, I am visiting some more old friends.  Judy and David have been to Austin, and met Dana, so when I tell my husband of my plans, he is aware of whom I am talking about, which always makes it easier!  I am on the downward spiral now, gearing up to leaving Blighty and all those whom I hope will enjoy the rest of their day.  The hurricane has caused a lot of devastation, and I am hoping (somewhat selfishly) that flights will be as near normal as possible on Tuesday.  Not getting back home would be quite a challenge!  I am trusting that there will be alternative routes, should the cause arise, but if not, can you imagine how much I would have to say in ............ another story!