I did not mean to smash the bowl. It was an accident. It fell off the table, and fell on to the floor. In fact, upon reflection, I am not one hundred percent sure that it was my fault, but Dana said he had not moved, and therefore, by process of elimination, it must be my fault. We were in Milwaukee, in a beautiful bed and breakfastOur trip started on Saturday morning. It was a trip that had not been well planned, and our last minute decision was based on us both remembering a 'really nice' restaurant on the shores of Lake Michigan, somewhere 'around' Milwaukee. We would be in the town where the seventies (running to eighties) television series 'Happy Days' was set. The choice of hotels were not appealing, until we came across a beautiful little 'bed and breakfast' just outside the main city.
I did not mean to smash the bowl, or fuse the kettle. It just happened! "We are going on vacation", said Dana as he slid into his first class seat. We had been upgraded graciously and gratis by the airline, and we were very grateful. "I am going on holiday and I am going to smash a bowl. I am going on holiday and I am going to smash a bowl, and fuse the kettle!" was not the game I had hoped to play! The word vacation still gets stuck!
The flight did fly by, and we enjoyed a complimentary breakfast with eggs, croissants, fruit and yogurt. We watched the latest version of Jumanji, and sat in our comfortable seats until we reached Chicago. The airport was full of sailors. Dana presumed that all were going out to take up their first tour of duty, after their basic training. Many were accompanied by other sailors, some by loved ones, spouses and parents. I spotted one such lad, accompanied by his mother, father and sister and approached his mother. "Is this your son, ma'am?" I asked in a very English accent but with the courtesy of an American. "Yes", she responded, although her eyes said, "Why". I continued, "Well, ma'am", softening my accent, "I would like to thank your son for his service, and thank you, as parents, for supporting him". I then thanked the young boy personally, and his parents shone with pride, and gratitude. Conflict is rarely (if ever) the decision of the everyday person, but it happens, and when it does, I am more than grateful to those who put their lives on the line for me, and am happy to tell them so!
Our next flight was on time, and once again we took our upgraded seats. The crew member who gave the safety talk was new. In fact I think she was still in training. She made a couple of mistakes whilst giving the demonstration, suggesting that we turn our phones on when the door closed, and all laptops and heavier electrical appliances be used during take of and landing, and stowed at all other times. I am sure we all knew what she meant and no one appeared to deviate from the norm. After we were airborne, I was offered an in flight beverage. Apparently, my drink of choice was not readily available and she had to go to the back of the plane to get it. As I took my first sip, she went to the front and started to give the 'preparation for landing' speech. I assumed that she had again made a mistake, as we had not had our 'welcome up here' chat yet! Barely had I taken a second sip did she attempt to prise the drink out of my hand. I resisted, although wearing a bright white top, considered it not a good idea to fight with a tomato juice in my hand. She insisted that she had to get the cabin ready for landing. Apparently, with only twenty minutes between 'wheels up' and 'wheels down', there was no time for frivolity or tomato juice! I gave in, but not before taking two more swallows.
I did not mean to smash the bowl, fuse the kettle, or trip the lights. It just happened! The car rental facility was just across from the terminal, which is always a blessing! "Do you want to upgrade?" asked the woman behind the desk. "But we ordered that model", said my husband, a little disappointed that he had been offered something else. "You ordered something like that model, not that model. Do you want to upgrade?" He declined. When did hiring a car become such a word game! However, the car that we were given was one that he had considered test driving, when we were looking for a new vehicle. It was perfectly comfortable.
Once the car had been scanned for dents, the cases deposited in the boot, and us sat in the front seats, we were missing one thing. A map. "You bring the maps, Matnee plugs in the phone. It's a given!" said I. Dana had not printed his usual set of maps. He had one of the downtown area, and one of the outlying area, but not from the airport to the B&B. He had asked the woman at the rental car desk. "Do you want to purchase the navigation system", she had asked. We did not. We wanted a map. Despite her senior years, she gave a look like, "a what now?" even though she showed no indication to being retired law enforcement!
We drove out of the airport, down to the road, and had to turn around. Once in the right direction, we found the road upon where the bed and breakfast was located and drove through to a dead end. We drove around and about, over a bridge, through a neighbourhood and out again, and eventually Dana stopped the car. I did not say a word. Out came the laptop, and the map was brought up on the screen. We drove back, through the neighbourhood, across the bridge and back to the road upon where the bed and breakfast stood. It was exactly where I thought it would be. However, as I do not know my right from my left, and am basically geographically challenged when it comes to the four main compass points, I do have a very good sense of direction, and Dana tried not to smile, when he said "Oh shut up!" as I sat in smug silence.
We walked down the road, and stopped at several establishments. Despite the television series being set in the fifties, the street upon which we traveled was very much stuck in the sixties, and the Cunninghams' were nowhere to be seen. The Beatles blared from most of the shops, and when we asked if anyone had any recommendation for dinner,said recommendations were all along this very road. When we mentioned a couple of places outside the 'road', there was a heavy silence, and comments, such as "We have heard about that, but never tried it". As we walked, we noticed a pub on the opposite side. Called 'The Highbury', it was decorated from top to bottom with bunting, that celebrated Liverpool football club. The noise coming from within sounded excitable. When the shops ended and the residences started, we crossed the road. A guitar shop on the corner was very interesting to Dana. We asked the occupant what was going on at the pub down the road. He did not understand the question. "The Bar", translated Dana. "The Highbury". The occupant did not know that bar. He knew every other bar along the road, but that 'may be new'. We had entered the twilight zone!
We stopped outside the pub, and were told that it was full to capacity. "Who's playing?" I asked. The accent got attention. "Liverpool and Real Madrid", said the man standing in the door. "Champion Cup Final?" I asked, and was granted 'standing room only', at the front door. I thanked him and we stood for a few minutes, and listened to opposing sides cheer. I did not mean to smash the bowl, fuse the kettle, trip the lights, stop the air conditioner or decommission the microwave! . It just happened! The hostess met us at the door of the bed and breakfast. It was delightful. Our living quarters consisted of two bedrooms, a living room, a kitchen and bathroom. "Please do not use the hair dryer, coffee maker and microwave at the same time. It fuses the breaker." I assured her that we have the same problem with our kettle and microwave. I would be careful. We asked about restaurants, and she told us all the wonderful places along the high road. "What about the Harbor House?" asked Dana. She had heard of it. In fact the establishment was owned by her daughter's in laws, and in her words, she did not know how 'they get away with it'. I assumed she referred to the high prices on the menu! "My husband is English", she added before she gave us the keys. "He is down at the pub, watching the match".
Instead of taking the advice and strong recommendations of the locals, we drove into town. We drove along the straight road, about four miles, into downtown Milwaukee. Mader's was amazing. A truly authentic German restaurant, the walls were covered with artifacts from various centuries. The food was spectacular. It was unfortunate that we were seated under a rather beautiful, ornate and intricate carving, as guest after guest stopped by our table to take a picture. We stopped posing after the first dozen! We walked after dinner, along the river walk. It was beautiful. The heat of the day had died down, and the evening was pleasant. Another reason for choosing Milwaukee was because we assumed it would be cooler, with temperatures rising to low 70's, but they were experiencing a heat wave!
I made a cup of tea when we got back to the bed and breakfast, and then watched some television before retiring.
I did not mean to smash the bowl, fuse the kettle, trip the lights, stop the air conditioner, decommission the microwave or break the coffee pot. It just happened. Sunday morning was beautiful. We had coffee on our private balcony, and watched the world go by, or not as the case was. We could have been in any New England state. The coffee pot was not easy to use. The coffee did not stop pouring out when the jug was removed. It did not stop pouring when I pulled the plug from the wall. It continued to pour, despite the two cups being full. I was unsure as to where all the extra water had come, but it came from somewhere. Breakfast was delicious. French toast, sausages, fruit covered with chocolate. A splendid repast. After breakfast, we met the host of our establishment. He had been in the USA for four years, and told us his stories regarding his immigration paperwork, a story told by all, with our own twists. He had not lost his Geordie accent. We conversed in English, leaving our spouses to wonder what we were talking about.
Our trip downtown did not take long. We walked along the river walk, saw the statue of 'The Fonz' and had our picture taken alongside. We were a little disappointed with the statue, which was rather less tall than we expected, but it was probably real size, despite the enormity of the character, which must prove how well the actor portrayed him!
After a long walk, we returned to the car, and drove to the Harbor House. We had intended getting a cold drink and be on our way, but as we watched everyone walk out of the restaurant with a plateful of delicious food, we decided to stay for lunch. Although we were under a shade, once inside the building, to get our plates and walk the buffet, I knew I could not return into the heat to eat. Instead, we found a seat at the bar, as the restaurant was completely booked, and sat on the corner seats, giving the illusion of a private table. Dinner was indeed delicious. Smoked salmon, soused herring, roast beef, and a lot more besides. We ate far more than we should, but enjoyed every bite. The gentleman carving the meat was wearing a 'retired marine' cap. I thanked him for his service. I told him that my husband and his family were all ex-military. "Are you Australian?", he asked. I smiled, and told him that I was English, but my husband was American. All seemed to fit into place then, although I know not why it would make a difference!We walked around the bay, and watched ships, tugs, yachts and dingies going to and fro, maybe just sailing around the lake, maybe lake hoping, maybe out to the wide open ocean. It was quite serene and beautiful. The breeze kept the temperature down, and we walked for quite some time before returning to the hotel.
I do not think it was the thud that caused the hostess to come up to our room. It was the vacuum. She knocked on the door as I was putting it away. The look of disappointment was not necessarily because I had just smashed one of her favourite bowls, but more of an 'I thought you would be more responsible'. I did ask Dana if she thought I was trying to sneak out without saying anything, and hiding the breakage, but he pointed out that the evidence was in the bin! We headed downstairs for the daily 'wine and cheese' hour, and listened to the host tell us about how he had met his wife many years ago, and how they had found each other again. One of the other guests asked if they ever had any problem clients. The response of our hostess was that 95% were wonderful, and she would consider, in a different setting, that they could be friends. Three percent she did not see as they came late and left early. One percent she could not remember their names, just because they did not leave an impression, but the final one percent, she made a note of their names so that she could say they were full, should they ever want to come again. As she finished the answer, a car containing four new guests arrived. "These are your new housemates", she said, but failed to introduce us by name! I knew we had made a very big impression!
We drove down to the supermarket between downtown and the high road. Dana had doubted its existence, as he had not seen it, but I was sure. Larger than life, the supermarket did exist. We came back to the bed and breakfast with popcorn and crisps. I made tea, boiling the kettle in the living room. I had only used one appliance at the same time, but the socket did not work in the kitchen, and the light would not go on so I could not see if there was a breaker to click. The microwave light was off, so we had to put that in a different socket, but they were all taken as I had been forced to put the air conditioner plug into the one that should have been taken by the microwave! I had wanted to write a note, but there was no paper, and I did not have a pad in my new overnight bag!
I did not mean to smash the bowl, fuse the kettle, trip the lights, stop the air conditioner, decommission the microwave or defrost the fridge. I had not noticed the puddle on the floor until the morning of our departure. I moped it up as best I could, but unplugging it from the socket would not stop the ice from melting. I had failed miserably!
We dropped the car off, and went to get our boarding passes. We had not been upgraded, but we did have a comfortable seats. Retracing our steps in reverse, we got back to Austin, picked up the car, and arrived home shortly after we were expected to land. Dana joined me by the pool, and we finished of our day by having dinner at an 'old favourite', along the high road!
I went on holiday and I managed to wreck an apartment! Dana said that he would email and apologise, in the hope that it would not only get rid of some of my guilt, but ensure that we were not blacklisted from the establishment. The answer and following weeks events will have to remain ..... another story!
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